ME: I have to go, Grammy. I have to get to the demonstration.
GRAMMY: You won’t take time to find a job, but you have time for a demonstration?
ME: Yes, Grammy. It’s important.
GRAMMY: Not as important as eating, obviously.
ME: I have my Unemployment, Grammy. And somebody has to do something. The dolphins can’t save themselves.
GRAMMY: And who’s gonna save the fishermen? You may be happy living on Unemployment, but that doesn’t mean they will.
ME: Well, they shouldn’t even be fishing in the first place. People shouldn’t eat other living creatures.
GRAMMY: But it’s okay for the animals you’re trying to save? They can eat other living creatures? And what about those plants you’re continuously shoving down your throat? They’re alive too, you know. Well, they are until you rip them from the ground and cut them into pieces.
ME: Plants aren’t sentient beings, Grammy.
GRAMMY: How do you know? Hard to tell when you don’t speak plant.
ME: I’m going to ignore you, Grammy, and go. See you later.
GRAMMY: (sigh) Give a woman a brain and her possibilities are endless. Give her a cause, and she’ll turn into a blithering idiot every time.
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4 comments:
But dolphins haven't been known to practically wipe out entire species. I'm not a vegetarian or anything, I love a good hamburger like almost everyone else. But I believe in having at least one cause. It gives you something to live for.
ME: Well, they shouldn’t even be fishing in the first place. People shouldn’t eat other living creatures.
You know I may have sided with you if you weren't so indignant. Who are you to say that people shouldn't eat other animals? I'm not saying you're wrong, b/c I don't know if I'm right for stuffing a ham sandwich in my face as I write this post. All I'm saying is how about having a little bit of respect for other peoples' decisions, opinions and lifestyles?
This is satire and humor. I make fun of everyone with equal vigor.
I'm SO late to this party. I would love to have been here when the Humorless Police broke the door down. I missed all the fun!
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