BEGGING

GRAMMY:  I saw your ex today.  He’s out in front of the supermarket begging.

ME:  Begging?

GRAMMY:  Yeah.  He was bent over on the ground, cup in front of him, scrounging for money.  Even got the cat and dog in on the act.

ME:  Oh, Grammy.  He wasn’t begging.  He trained the cat and dog to do that ages ago.  It’s the art of Street Performance.

GRAMMY:  Well, that’s exactly what he was doing - performing the art of begging in the street.  And how the hell is that gonna help Julius?

ME:  What do you mean?

GRAMMY:  Admit it, Barbara.  The boy has idiots for parents.

ME:  That’s nonsense, Grammy.

GRAMMY:  Yeah, well tell him that when he goes to school and everyone makes fun of him because his father is begging outside the supermarket.

ME:  I told you.  He’s not begging.  He’s performing.  And even if you don’t understand that, other people will.

GRAMMY:  Well, if you’re not gonna do something about it, I am.

ME:  Grammy?  Where are you going with that rifle?

GRAMMY:  The supermarket.  I’m gonna put on a little performance of my own.