Wednesday, January 20, 2010

MERMAIDS














GRAMMY:  So, this is your room, huh?

JULIUS:  Uh, huh.

GRAMMY:  Manly.  I guess you like mermaids.

JULIUS:  Uh, huh.  Did you know mermaids can sing underwater?

GRAMMY:  Oh, yeah?  What do they sing?

JULIUS:  They sing songs for sailors.  But they don’t let the sailors see them.

GRAMMY:  And do they sell sea shells by the sea shore?

JULIUS:  What?

GRAMMY:  Nothing.  Why don’t they let the sailors see them?  You’d think they’d like a little company now and then.

JULIUS:  They don’t want anyone to know they’re there, Grammy.

GRAMMY:  Then why the hell do they sing at all?

JULIUS:  To lure the sailors near the rocks.  So they’ll crash and sink to the bottom of the sea.

GRAMMY:  Ha!  Sadistic little suckers, aren’t they.

JULIUS:  What’s sa . . . sadistic?

GRAMMY:  Oh, it just means they like to be mean for fun.

JULIUS:  Mermaids aren’t mean, Grammy.  They just make the sailors crash so they won’t catch dolphins in their tuna nets.  I’m going to be a mermaid when I grow up.

GRAMMY:  Lord.  Another bleeding-heart liberal is born.

Photo Maura Wolfson-Foster

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4 comments:

Diane Mayr said...

Go, Julius! Although someone should tell him he could be a merman if he wants to be.

Barbara said...

Bad, Diane! Bad! You're cheering on the slaughter of inncocent people!

Andy said...

Really, Diane! It's not like the sailors are eating snowman noses, which is a killing offense.

Diane Mayr said...

It's all about perspective Barbara. You see it as slaughtering sailors, I see it as saving innocent dolphins.