ME: Hello, Grammy!
(no answer)
ME: Grammy!
(no answer)
ME: Grammy? Oh, my . . . Julius, quick. Call 911.
JULIUS: Is she dead?
ME: I don’t know. Call 911.
JULIUS: The phone won’t work. I think they’re both dead.
ME: Oh, my God. Grammy? Grammy?
GRAMMY: Ha! April Fools!
ME: Grammy!
GRAMMY: Thought I was dead, didn’t you?
ME: Yes! Why would you do something like that?
GRAMMY: What, are you deaf? I said April Fools.
ME: April Fool’s Day is tomorrow, Grammy. Not today.
GRAMMY: Well, what’s the point of playing a damn joke on April Fool’s Day? Then you’d know it was a joke. Besides, you don’t come over here on Thursdays.
ME: I can’t believe you did that, Grammy. I could kill you!
GRAMMY: Ha! A minute ago you were in tears because you thought I was dead. Now you’re gonna kill me? Make up your mind. Do you want me dead or alive?
ME: I want you alive, Grammy, so I can kill you myself. Come on, Julius. We’re leaving.
GRAMMY: Hey! Where are you going? I thought you were gonna kill me? Sheesh. That woman will never amount to anything. No follow through.
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